Of Condoms and Coffee
by BooksThatareMoviesThatareOnTV
Summary: I don't have a real summary... It's set in a coffeshop. Quinn's hungry and Santana is working. They don't know each other. One shot. F/F The story doesn't involve condoms cuz they gay, I just needed a title.


**Thanks for reading! A HUGE thank you to Ayofluff, momo0424, and SilverStreaksofStardust for being so awesome. If any of my faithful followers have any questions about the very long hiatus on the other stories, message me and I'll tell you all about my woes lol.**

 **Hope you all enjoy this one. :)**

 **~Kay**

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It was a relatively nice Friday morning in Houston, Texas. It was hot but not too dry, and the nice blue sky looked like it could be straight out of a painting. As cliché as it sounds, the birds were chirping and Quinn had been having a pretty wonderful day. By the time she finished everything she wanted to do at home, it was an hour after the busy lunchtime rush hour, so she knew she could go to pretty much any restaurant and not be inconvenienced.

The tall woman put on a plain white top with a yellow cardigan and dark blue jeans, paired with her favorite pair of white flats. She practically skipped out the door and stepped into her SUV and started the fifteen minute drive to the _Falling Star Bread Company._ She heard from a friend that this place had the best food in town.

Parking in the ahandicapped spot with her great aunt's sticker, she walked into the small restaurant and was immediately wrapped in wafting scents of food.

There was a case filled with pastries and delicious-looking tarts next to the counter where she was going to order her food.

At the counter, however, was one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen. Her face…dear Baby Jesus, her face was something magnificent. The dark green polo shirt complimented her olive tone beautifully. The Latina woman had long locks of jet-black hair pulled back into a high ponytail, thick black glasses and an intense look of concentration on her face as she leaned on the counter while she filled something out on a paper. It was a uniform, but this woman could walk the red carpet in nothing else and start a riot.

Quinn's ogling was quickly interrupted when the beautiful woman coughed into her shirt and went back to scratching something on her paper. The blonde quickly stepped up to the large overhead menu and scanned it, wondering what she should get. The selection of food resembled any other bread company, but she could they had their own twist to everything.

After a good five minutes, Quinn knew what she wanted. "Hello, I would like to get the three-cheese and sun-dried tomato panini, with a little bit of extra chicken, please. Chips and water on the side. Thank you." She moved to pull out her wallet but noticed that the woman (Santana, according to her name tag), hadn't even looked up from whatever she was doing. Quinn looked around and saw that other employees were busy working at other stations. She noticed the others were wearing white shirts instead of green, but thought that it may be because baristas wore a different uniform. But she had much more important things to worry about, than a uniform. She was hungry. "Miss?" No answer. She could already feel her good mood plummeting.

The blonde waited semi patiently for the woman to look up, glancing at her watch every now and then. After exactly forty-five point five seconds, she cleared her throat and spoke again. "Hello?"

"It's me," Santana quipped, glancing up with a slight smirk before continuing what she was doing. The blonde squinted and crossed her arms as she took on her HBIC stance. "What?"

"We weren't doing Adele?" Dark brown eyes looked up in curiosity, humor lurking behind them. The Latina looked mildly disappointed for a beat, before shrugging and looking back down, humming some pop song while tapping her pen against the counter. Sure, she was caught off guard by the blonde woman's beauty, but she had shit to do. She should care that a paying customer was waiting for service, but she didn't.

"Cute," The blonde lady sneered, to which the barista's face lit up with a smile as she flipped her hair dramatically and proudly examined her freshly clipped, buffed, and clear coated nails.

"Thank you! I cut my nails just the other night for a date that I hoped would end with a _bang_ , if you know what I mean." She sent a cheesy wink in the upset woman's direction, laughing at her own joke. "And maybe you might have noticed when you were staring at me for, like, three minutes, but I have a new face wash too. Now my face is smoother than my dildo's nut sack." Santana leaned over the counter and help her cheek out toward Quinn. "See? Feel it."

"You're _disgusting_ ," Quinn managed to say in her most repulsed voice. And much to her displeasure, Santana only pulled back with almost the same grin; this one was a little cheekier (no pun intended).

"That may be, but the food here is delicious."

Quinn thought it was time to foot down, and she did just that - literally and figuratively. "I demand to speak to your manager!" At barista's heavy sigh she gave herself a satisfied smile.

Santana stood up straight and rolled her eyes as went to the small microphone used to let customers know their food was ready. "Can I get a manager up front, please?" She looked towards the swinging doors that lead to the _Employee's Only_ section before looking back at Quinn. "Give me just a second alright? I think she might be in her office." Her voice was softer, almost solemn. Quinn watched happily as she walked away. This just might teach her a lesson in customer service.

She pulled out a paper menu to look over and re-decide what she wanted. Everything just looked so damned _good_! Especially the chicken and avocado club... Quinn was brought out of her hunger-filled musings as a smooth, polite, and cheery voice.

"Hello, welcome to Falling Star Bread Company. What seems to be the problem, Miss?"

"Oh, yes. Hello." Quinn hurried to put the menu back, fumbling slightly. "I just wanted to inform you of the horrible cus―" The rest of her words died in her throat as she looked up at the manager, seeing the smiling face of the woman she intended to report.

"Is something wrong, Ma'am?" The Latina's face showed concern as she tilted her head to the side slightly. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

Quinn's jaw quickly came up from the ground, lips forming a thin line as she stared at the name tag the barista must have stuck on the polo when she went to the back: _Manager._

"You've got to be kidding me?! You are _not_ the manager!" she threw her perfectly manicured hands up in disbelief, asking every deity what she did to deserve this.

"As a matter of fact, I am. At least I hope so since my name is on the official documents when I bought the place." She looked around fondly and smiled, pulling at the white cardigan she slid on when she went to get herself. Almost as though it were an afterthought she added, "I must say, you should put one of those expensive hand-me-down tables to use and try the food sometime; it's quite delicious." This was the most fun Santana had since that morning, and she was saving this moment in her mental scrapbook.

Quinn released a growl of frustration, tugging at a tuff of choppy hair that Santana noticed had a few light brown streaks. "That's what I've been _trying_ to do!"

"Whoa!" The barista put her hands up in mock surrender. "Can someone please get this bitch her coffee before something foul crawls out her ass?" Santana called back to the two men slicing bread and bagging to her right. They laughed and spoke softly to each other, gesturing to the two women. The muscular young man with the darker hair went to work on an elaborate coffee machine that wasn't too far from raven-haired beauty.

"Did you just call me a bitch?!"

"If the dick fits." Santana just shrugged casually and went back filling out her forms, leaving an open-mouthed Quinn to fume to herself.

" _Excuse me_?!" Her face was flushed and her chest heaved dramatically, reminding Santana of the white girls in those shitty _Lifetime_ movies her mom watched.

"You're excused… there's a bathroom down that hall to your left if you need to use it." She didn't even look up from her papers. "But please don't break too much wind on the way there, people are eating." The woman being spoken too huffed, even more bothered than she was before she walked into the quirky restaurant. This barista just knew how to push just the right buttons to make her furious.

"Y-you…You're _such_ an asshole!" Quinn sputtered, waving her hand in Santana's general direction. The woman spoken to just grinned, showing off a beautiful teasing smile. Quinn swore her heart jumping was just from the lack of food, never because of _her._

"You wanna eat it?" Santana chuckled but was slightly concerned about the way the pale woman's face almost turned an odd shade of purple so quickly. Her laughter quickly died down, however, when she noticed her entertainment walking away. "Wait!" She called, quickly putting her stuff down and standing up when the blonde didn't stop. She practically ran to the block the door, causing Quinn to huff and cross her arms in agitation.

"I'm sorry," Santana started with what she hoped was an apologetic smile. "It was just too much fun messing with you." She gave a geeky laugh that Quinn thought to be a little endearing even though she was stony faced and attempted to move past the girl. Once again, the door was blocked. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Why the hell should I stand here and listen to this halfhearted apology? What do you want? Huh?"

 _"Order up!"_ Santana looked over towards the call and back to an almost tearful Quinn, who continued to speak. "Do you treat all your customers like this? Or is it just the really hungry ones?" Santana opened her mouth to speak but was stopped by a hand held up. "No, no. Don't speak… You know, it's people like you who cause desperately hungry people like me to eat those god awful burritos at the Taco Bell. You know why? Because half of the time the employees aren't sober and they're nice to their patrons. I asked for a _nacho belle grande_ and they serve me my box of diarrhea-smothered heart failure with a goddamned smile and extra kindness!"

Santana honestly didn't know what the fuck to say when that first tear rolled down Quinn's porcelain cheek. She sighed and reached out as if she were going to comfort the woman, but thought better of it. As a matter of fact, the more she thought about it, the more she didn't give a shit what this woman had to say. She had a goal in mind and she was going to meet it.

"Shut the hell up and suck my ass," Santana said plainly, enjoying the way Quinn's eyes went comically wide. She walked away to a different counter and came back, with a big bag and a cup of coffee in hand. "I had your lunch made at that counter over there, fixed with a bag of chips, water, and my recommended coffee. And before you ask, I didn't give you what you asked for because you'll enjoy my special a lot more."

Santana practically shoved the food and drink in Quinn's hands, then turned around to go back to her counter. She looked back and called out to the pleasantly surprised girl, "It's on the house. Make sure you read the cup and get the hell out of my shop." Quinn silently followed her advice and read the coffee cup once she was in the familiar setting of her car.

 _Hey, Heffer. I like having you around. Come see me sometime. Xxx-xxx-xxxx._

Quinn's chest was heaving as she stormed back into the store and yelled at the surprised manager, "Fuck you, Santana!" She then stormed back out as dramatically as possible to the comfort of her car. But not before she heard the response she had secretly wanted all along.

" _That's the goal!_ "


End file.
